Fox News

As anyone who's read this blog can probably tell, I bend a little more toward the conservative than the liberal side of the fence.  Perhaps it's my age, and I can't tell you whether I've evolved politically since I cast my first vote back in the 1980 Presidential election.  To quote Popeye, I yam what I yam.

That's not to say that I kneel at the altar of conservatism.  I am not an unabashed apologist for all things conservative.  For one, I am not a Republican.  In fact, I'm a Marxist:  I'd never join a club that would have me as a member.  Think Groucho, not Karl.

Second, there are some conservative mouthpieces from whom I shy away.  I'm not a huge fan of Rush Limbaugh, for example.  Our Mother seemed to think she was on a first name basis with him, since whenever she'd refer to something she heard him say, she'd preface it by saying, Well, as Rush said....  I've never listened to more than a snippet of what he had to say.  Likewise, I've never listened to Glenn Beck.  I have nothing against them personally, I just don't like their delivery systems.  I'm sure there are others out there whom I would likewise find disagreeable, but I can't say I know of them.

It wasn't until I had some free time on my hands that I started watching Fox News last fall.  Truly, I'd never paid any attention to the station.  But when the whole Benghazi thing started, I was fascinated and appalled at the same time that only one station was giving the issue continual coverage, as if it didn't matter to anyone else that four Americans were killed in a terrorist attack, that they worked for the American government and no one in the government seemed much to care.

So I started watching and immediately began noticing some things.  First, and most evidently, Fox likes pretty women, and usually pretty blonde women.  From morning until night, about the only time a brunette makes an appearance is either as a guest or a substitute, with one notably unfortunate exception.  Unfortunately, despite some of them having some very decent credentials, they do little to dispel the myth of the dumb blonde.  I'm sure that all of them are educated, but the way their bosses either encourage them to talk or how the ratings compel them to talk, they have this maudlin, unctuous tone when they try to seem sympathetic, and when they're in disagreement with something, they try to maintain a DAR demeanor while showing their outrage.  I have little doubt as to the sincerity of their feelings on either level, but how they show them is a little disingenuous.

Megyn Kelly anchors the midday show.  She's quite appealing to the eye, but the minute she opens her mouth the illusion's over.  She almost sounds like a truck driver.  I know she used to be an attorney, but for someone with that background, one would think she could think better on her feet. Oftentimes, she appears tongue-tied when forced to speak extemporaneously.  She tries to sound authoritative about things, but she comes off as foolish most often.  It's often best to watch her segments with the sound off.

One of my favorite shows is The Five.  Five commentators -- four conservative, one liberal -- talk about current events.  The blonde, Dana Perino, is a former spokesperson for George W. Bush. Almost counterintuitively, she's the best female at Fox News of those who appear during the day. The only flaw I can find with her is that she's married to a Brit.  There are those who like Greta Van Sustern, but she's a little too dry for my tastes.

Kimberly Guilfoyle is beautiful in an almost exotic way.  But it's hard to believe she was a prosecuting attorney at one point in her career.  She's almost like a sorority sister who's got the leading GPA in her house which is only a middling average compared to the rest of the campus.  She likes to play the coquette too much for my tastes, something none of the other women on Fox does.

Eric Bolling is quality.  I appreciate his demeanor on the show and how he mixes it up with the resident liberal, Bob Beckel.  For all his liberal leanings, I actually appreciate Bob Beckel, although sometimes he strains credulity to support the Left.  The troublesome one is Greg Gutfeld.  For as much as I agree with him, I hate his enfant terrible act.  I'm sure there are some inside jokes between him, Perino and Guilfoyle, but he's almost like the younger brother who's hell-bent on annoying his older sisters.  His monologues are tiresome exercises of conceit.  All right already:  We get that you have a nicely developed vocabulary.

Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly are quality people, but O'Reilly has a little too much showman in him for my tastes.  Truth be told, I don't really watch Hannity that much, so I can't comment on him. O'Reilly I watch only when there's a spill-over from the hour before him or if there's a particularly juicy topic he's addressing.  He is fearless; I'll give him that.

I think it's Limbaugh whose legion of followers is called the Dittoheads.  But just as I chastise the liberals for adhering to what the likes of Madonna, Alec Baldwin and Bill Maher tell them to believe, I too can think for myself.  Fox serves one purpose and one purpose only:  It's a counterweight to the rest of the MSM and brings me news I'm almost guaranteed not to hear anywhere else.

(c) 2013 The Truxton Spangler Chronicles