Local Radio

In our travels, Karen and I like to listen to the radio in the car.  We used to have Sirius XM, but that became a joke with the cost and the renewals, so we let that go.  Instead, when we travel we tune into whatever radio station catches our fancy.

Last year we took a trip to D.C. and were traveling back through Kentucky on our way home.  Karen found a station that played bluegrass and Christian music.  What got our attention, however, was the folksy manner of the host, who kept referring to musicians with whom he'd played that had recorded the songs he was about to play.  Added to that were the announcements for garage sales that were going on in the county.  We were transfixed.  Think of it as a kind of southern Lake Woebegon. 

We were genuinely tickled.  The moderator, an older gentleman, spoke with that easy, Southern drawl from southern Kentucky.  He was so matter-of-fact that it made us feel as if we'd known the man for ages.  He waxed nostalgic as he reviewed the musicians and the work on which they'd collaborated.  The announcements for the garage sales were so earnest that one would have thought he had a stake in their outcome.  The garage sales themselves were broken down with the items for sale announced over the radio, followed by an encouragement to stop by and check out the sale.  Larger items -- car engines, truck wheels, lawn mowers -- were described in detail and hawked as if the moderator had personally tried each item before it was listed.  But make no mistake:  This was no hard-sell.  It was about as gentle a sales pitch as there could be.

When we finally traveled out of the range of the station we were genuinely disappointed.

Our hometown radio station is unintentionally funny.  To begin with, and to our utter amazement, the woman who does the weather -- let's call her Heidi Mayer -- cannot pronounce her title:  Meteorologist.  Ms. Mayer instead calls herself a meteorolovist.  No, she doesn't have a speech impediment.  There is no discernible reason why she can't pronounce her title, but no one mentions this openly weird fact on the air.  As far as I'm aware, no one has ever called in and asked about it on the air, either. 

But it's the reports on events in our neighborhoods that get me going.  One report involving a local high school's purchase of a new scoreboard for the football field took five minutes.  Five stinking minutes.  They went through how the money was appropriated, why the new scoreboard was necessary, why the old scoreboard was no longer useful, an interview with the athletic director about the new scoreboard, how the scoreboard would enhance the experience at the game and when it would be installed.  If one thought the report ended with the date of its installation, one would be wrong.  The facts about the installation were then examined.  As with the Kentucky moderator, the reporter gave us all this information with an earnestness so true that one almost believed that the story about the new scoreboard merited even more airtime.

Not to be outdone by a new scoreboard, the station had a story about the same high school purchasing new band uniforms.  Without exaggerating, this story included news on how long it had been since new uniforms had been purchased, how much they would cost, the history of the band's accomplishments, an interview with the band director, news of the invitation the band had received to participate in the Tournament of Roses (or some such event) parade, how many members were in the band and sundry details that no one really needed to know.  A story that should have lasted less than a minute went five minutes easily.

At least this station plays the kind of music I like.

For Memorial Day, Karen and I visited Michigan's Upper Peninsula.  The land of the Yoopers promised to have unintentionally entertaining radio, and we weren't disappointed.  Somewhere in the Keweenah peninsula a radio station was offering for sale discount coupons for amenities at restaurants and other shops.  For example, one could purchase for $8 a coupon for a walleye dinner for two that regularly sold for $20.  Or a $4 coupon for the purchase of beers at a bar that regularly cost $12.  The deals were fantastic.  I called from the road as we were headed south toward the Wisconsin border and was told that we only had two more hours to purchase coupons; we were at least three hours away from the station in Eagle River.  As with the Kentucky moderator, this sales pitch was laid back, albeit with the Yooper accent, and like the Kentucky offers, presented excellent deals. 

These kinds of experiences aren't going to be found on radio stations in major cities or on XM stations.  Sure, XM has some interesting shows.  It even has some shocking shows.  But these stations are a throwback to an earlier, more innocent time.  There are still people who appreciate the less urbane, the less hip.

Count me and Karen among the latter group.  We can't wait until we take another trip so we can find more hidden gems like these.

(c) 2016 The Truxton Spangler Chronicles