In the interest of full disclosure, I admit to being a loyal fan of three reality shows: The Amazing Race, Yukon Men and Top Chef. The first affords me the opportunity to see places I'll never visit and the second amazes me with the skills these people have for cooking. The third is simply amazing. Beyond that, I may peek from time to time at a reality show , but that's only because Karen watches far more of them than I do.
But piggybacking on her viewing, I've gotten to see some shows that are, shall we say, questionable. Because they're on particular channels, we also get to see the promos for other reality shows. It seems as if more and more, there are wacky concepts that provide people with reasons to appear on television. I don't understand the attraction for most of them, to be honest, but then again, there are probably people who question my choices, which is only fair.
Here then are some reality shows that cause me to scratch my head:
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo: How on God's green earth is it necessary for a television show made in America regarding Americans to have subtitles? That alone makes this lunacy. Then there's the obnoxious quality of the people in the show. Nevermind what's happened to them recently; this show is a train wreck.
My Crazy Obsession: All I needed to see to know that this show wasn't for me was the promo for the guy who was kissing and fondling his car. It's the functional equivalent of filming inside an insane asylum.
Hoarders: Karen thinks I'm a hoarder; I'm not. I have a lot of books, sure, but I have nothing on an order with the people in this show. I don't like filth (although my girl regards anything that's not hospital-level antiseptic as filth) and these people, besides keeping junk, are just filthy.
Naked and Afraid: Let me see if I get this straight: We put a man and a woman in the jungle, naked, and task them with toughing it out for twenty-one days. They get a machete and a bag and nothing else? And then we blur out the private parts after we put that name on the show? What's the point? And what compels a person to be on such a show in the first place?
Moonshiners: Another absolute headscratcher. So someone's engaged in a criminal enterprise and he decided to go on television showing him committing the crime? How is this even allowed? And why isn't the guy in jail?
Half Pint Brawlers: Little people wrestlers? Seriously?
Pit Bulls and Parolees: Pit bulls and matched with parolees for what reason, exactly? And why isn't Michael Vick on this show?
Hillbilly Handfishin': Yahoos stick their hands under water and pull out catfish that are bigger than their arms. And they get bitten. How long can and audience's attention be held for that?
Any Housewives show: I admit I watched a season or two because I was mesmerized by rich people acting like they had their arses on their shoulders to the point the police were called in. But the fake drama, the out-of-touch-with-reality members of the shows, and all the stinking spinoffs...ugh. It's a narcissist's wet dream.
Hard Knocks: I'm a sports nut, but I'm not a big pro football fan and I've never seen this show. I can't imagine anything more boring that watching a football team practice.
Dancing With the Stars: I'm not sure this qualifies. Technically, it's a game show. But it's about celebrities as themselves trying to do something that's not their forte, which is otherwise fine. Where I part company with it is when the supposed ballroom dancing veers into Broadway spectacles or, worse, stripper club routines that are more suited to a Vegas show. Even Karen thinks it's jumped the shark.
There are more that I can't remember at the moment. But these suffice to show just how absurd reality TV can be.
(c) 2014 The Truxton Spangler Chronicles
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